Stop Paying for Animal Rides at the Mall — Buy Your Own Motorized Rolling Horse

Let’s do some quick math. Those weird animal ride-ons at the mall cost $20 per hour, so 15 rides would equal $300. If you believe your child could or would spend that much time on a giant motorized rolling creature, the smart financial decision might be to buy a Kid Trax 12-Volt Rideamals Scout Pony Interactive Ride-On for $298 and keep it at home for endless use.

Scout has functions the mall animals don’t — it reacts to being brushed and “fed” and can even dance. With a library of sounds, movements, and music, it also feels friendlier than its counterparts in retail captivity. Somewhere in there is a message about the delicate balance between man and nature, wrapped in the scratchy blanket of capitalism.