Vintage High Ankle Jean | H&M
Vintage Slim Ankle Jean | H&M
Graphic: Jillian Lucas

Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses legs yearning to breathe free.

Every time I try on jeans, I feel the need to give myself a virtuous monologue perfomance in the mirror. Basically, jeans are my enemy, one I don’t want to spend much time battling. Yet, these super affordable “vintage” cut H&M jeans are now my GOAT.

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I bought two cuts of their Vintage jeans: the Vintage High Ankle Jeans and the Vintage Slim Ankle Jean. Both hit my waist right at my belly button, the pockets don’t bunch, and I don’t have a perma-wedgie (plus, my butt looks great). These two jeans have now been in rotation every week and I feel like I can never wear any other pair of jeans again.

To be fair, I had to cut like three inches off the bottom (though being 5'1", that’s the case with practically all things made for an “average” sized human), but these were the jeans I had been searching for, especially now with a trendy frayed hem. What made them truly great, and what is usually the achilles heel of most jeans I try on, is that they are sturdy denim that is just cut perfectly. No Super-360-Stretch or Curve-Hugging Technology. They’re just straight cut jeans with no bells, but all the whistles.

The only downside (which is sort of a plus when you think about it) is that because of the basically non-existence spandex in the makeup of these jeans, they don’t stretch out during the day. With stiffer denim, that’s an advantage, because it’ll hug your shape and stay hugging your shape all day, but it’s not so great when it comes to food babies, sitting for long periods of time, or tucking much material into the waistband. But, these are sacrifices I am willing to make.

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Also, please don’t @ me about the button fly. I’m 100% pro-button fly in all aspects and you will not convince me otherwise.