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Help! My Quarantine Beard Trimmings Are EVERYWHERE

Illustration for article titled Help! My Quarantine Beard Trimmings Are EVERYWHERE
Photo: Nathon Oski (Unsplash)
SqualorJolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She’ll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her.

It’s certainly a wild time for hair care! People are trying out at-home hair color (got you covered!), cutting bangs (stop that!), and in many cases, growing elaborate beards and mustaches. Fun! Jaunty!! Horribly mess-making!!! Because, ugh, beard trimmings :( The good news here is that there are all kinds of clever and creative solutions to the problem of beard trimmings getting everywhere and I’ve rounded up the best.

Just like there are capes for use when coloring or cutting hair, there exist in this world capes for beard trimming, and they are quite clever! They are, essentially, giant bibs BUT they have suction cups on the hem that can be attached to a mirror. That way, the trimmings are caught by the bib, which can then be shaken out into the trash.


There are also versions that don’t require a mirror to adhere suction cups.

This method is predicated on drying the sink out thoroughly before trimming commences but yes, you can use a handheld vacuum to pick up all those stray hairs. A handheld with a flexible hose, like ones designed for cars, are best for this and you should avoid using any sort of bristle attachment—the hairs will just get caught in the bristles and end up everywhere but inside the vacuum.


You can also use things you probably already have around the house! Here are some ideas:

Kind of like with at-home hair color, beard trimming is a grooming ritual that benefits from a bit of set-up. And just like at-home hair color, one easy way to protect your sink from the ravages of your vanity is to simply line it with paper towels or newspapers (supermarket circulars are, weirdly, the perfect size and paper weight). After trimming, simply bundle the paper towels or newspaper up and toss them in the trash.


You can also use plastic grocery bags to line a sink or countertop. Split the bag along one seam to get more coverage area and, if necessary to keep the lightweight plastic from moving around, grab a jar of pomade or a stick of deodorant and use it to hold the bag down (kind of like how you use objects to keep a beach towel from blowing around on the sand!) Also, if you regularly trim your beard, you may want to put a plastic bag dispenser in the bathroom so your bag stash is right on hand.


This is a nice option because it’s reusable and can be made out of empty cardboard delivery boxes. Make a fold or flap at the bottom of the posterboard or cardboard that will go over your sink area—the trimmings will land on the board, which can then be tipped into the trashcan for easy disposal.


The idea here is more or less the same as using paper towels or newspapers—hair will land on the sheet or towel as you trim. When you’re done, you can simply shake the hair into the trash or take the towel or sheet outside and give your fur to nature. Something on the smaller side, like a hand towel or pillowcase, will be ideal because it will be easier to gingerly fold up to contain the hair while you’re carrying it to the trashcan.


Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert, advice columnist and the host of the podcast Ask a Clean Person

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