I’m happy too, I really did miss you guys during my exile <3 <3 <3 Read more

HAHAHA yes this is true! The problem is that this isn’t really a ~cleaning~ issue, it’s a behavioral one and that’s not my area of expertise! (The straight answer, from a cleaning perspective it, “pick up the wrappers” but the OP 1. knows that and 2. that’s not the solution she/he is looking for!) Read more

K, soak the bag in hot water+a small amount of detergent, then use a laundry brush/old toothbrush/nail brush to scrub away the candy once it’s a bit pliable from exposure to the hot water. Then launder and air dry. LMK how you do! Read more

How melted is it? Fully liquified-melted or just, like, kind of stuck on but still in hard candy form? Read more

What if you made picking up wrappers a game? Is that too simplistic of me to even suggest? (It probably is, sorry!!) Also this might make you laugh, it could always be worse! Read more

Truly, you have nothing to fear from me. Read more

If you do decide to come, please email me so I can be sure to wear my Nomar shirt for the occasion. Read more

An observation: Despite your protests, when I stick to sports (unless I’m going on in on hockey, God bless us all, everyone) you basically ignore me. Next week I’ll stick to spots. Read more

Leather cleaner/conditioner will work, but if they’re very grimy you may need saddle soap for the job. Read more

Oh I bet one of those upholstery cleaning machines would take that stain out! There’s also a product called K2r that’s really great on older stains, so if you want a cheaper option to try, start with that. Skip the brush that comes with the can and get a nail or laundry brush instead, it will work better. Read more

I hate to give you bad news on my first day, but I think that stain is probably not coming out. You could, however, soak the item in diluted OxiClean overnight and see if that does the trick. (It will probably not do the trick, but it’s worth a shot!) Read more

I passed a guy literally THROWING yellow Pine Sol on the sidewalk on my way to my recording studio on Thursday and the smell made me want to die (and I, like, love the smell of ammonia) so I feel you. Read more

Haha no I’m not kidding at all (my Deadspin readers are so used to this, I really promise!) Read more

Oh wow, thank you! That’s a really nice welcome—I love Jalopnik so much and I’m really excited to get to hang with you guys in a more official capacity. Since you mentioned you’re into detailing, if you ever want to share tips with me, I’m honestly all ears. My email is joliekerr@gmail.com. TELL ME YOUR SECRETS! Read more

Well thank you for the lovely welcome! And great tips :) Read more

Oooh I’m gonna look into this, thanks! Read more

My God, this is so beautiful, it’s making my Clean Heart sing. Are you single, by any chance? Read more

Kristen literally had to pull my pedestrian ass out of moving traffic yesterday, I’m pretty sure she’s nope-ing on out of this assignment. (Also I’m terrified of her.) Read more

<3 <3 <3 Read more

(Also you’ll learn to accept the yelling. I just get very excited about my work, it’s queerly charming once you get used to it.) Read more