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SEX WEEK: Consider The Condom Caddy

Illustration for article titled SEX WEEK: Consider The Condom Caddy
Photo: Jolie Kerr

My condom bowl — a pink glass dish that evokes a lady lounging in a bathtub — was a birthday gift. It wasn’t intended to be used as a condom dish, but when I told the gift giver what I had in mind for it she was delighted, “I saw it and thought, ‘Jolie has to have this,’ but that’s even better than I imagined!”

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The condom bowl sits out, in plain sight. Before acquiring it, my condoms were stashed in the place where most people’s condom stashes are, the bedside table drawer. And that was fine! Except for two things. The first is that it meant stopping during foreplay to get up, open the drawer, grab a condom and, right, that was always just awkward and annoying. Before the condom dish arrived in my life, I’d taken to grabbing condoms and leaving them on my nightstand when I knew a friend was coming over, but that just felt … I dunno. Presumptuous? Calculated? Something something?

The act of leaving the condoms out, however, solved (or at least mitigated) the second of my condom problems: The “do we have to???” condom whine. I found that when the condoms were just out there, there was much less of a negotiation about using them. And that’s why, when I saw my beautiful pink lady bowl, I knew exactly to what purpose I would put her. She’s wonderful and, because she’s a conversation piece in her own right, I’ve definitely had to face much less of the dreaded condom negotiation.

So! I tell you that to tell you, the condom-using person, this: Consider the condom dish.

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The are as many options for condom dishes as there are positions in the Kama Sutra (more, actually), but to get your creative and, ahem, other kinds of juices flowing, here are some condom caddy options for you to consider.

For ease of access, I’d suggest an open, rather than covered, bowl or dish, like these candy dishes.

Technically, this is a nut bowl [wiggles eyebrows]

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If camp is more your style, you could, naturally, go big on whimsy!

For reasons of modesty, however, some may prefer a lidded condom caddy. This is a pretty, if a bit rococo, choice.

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This clear glass dish won’t hide the contents, but the lil bunny on the lid is certainly a cheeky choice. “Babe! Let’s fuck like rabbits.”

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Want something more discreet? This mini metal tin would work on top of a bedside table, and doubles as a travel case for those Tinder Tourism jaunts.

If the tin is too minimalist for your tastes, but a travel case appeals to your sense of wanderlust, this red Alessi condom box has a bit more personality. It would also make a cute gift! But, caveat emptor: it’s designed to only hold one condom.

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Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert, advice columnist and the host of the podcast Ask a Clean Person

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